How You Do It? I’ll Never Know… But You Must Be Awesome
January 27, 2009
I spent today at home with my darling daughter – just us girls.
GeekDaddy left sometime around 0-dark-thirty for a business trip to Philadelphia, so today was just me, Buttercup, and the cat & dog. Plus freezing temperatures and horridly grey weather colored with a bit of snow for variety.
Tonight found me trying to put her to bed alone and now that she’s 6, realizing that it’s actually much harder than it was when she was younger. When it was just us and she was younger, bedtime w/o Daddy just meant the same usual struggle as every night. Now she’s more aware of it when one of us is out of town. Makes for several more ‘I couldn’t sleep because…’ trips.
I have to say that while I love my daughter with every ounce of my being, it’s weeks like this that I wonder how single parents make it without totally losing their sanity. Especially those that work and are pretty much without any nearby family to support them. I think they are made of sterner – or perhaps less selfish – stuff than I.
I do suspect that far too many of them sacrifice sleep in favor of “just a little me time” at night after the child(ren) are asleep. It would certainly explain that glazed look so many single-parent friends of mine seem to have even after their past the early years of infant-originated sleep deprivation.
I just thought I’d take a second to recognize how amazing you single-parents are… because it’s nights like this one that make me think how awesome anyone is that can do this as such and somehow manage to raise happy, healthy children.
Meanwhile, I’m going to bed – I somehow have to be up at 5:30a tomorrow to get my daughter to school on time. It’s a good thing GeekDaddy comes home in a couple of days or I’d so be considering home schooling just so I wouldn’t have to drive before 9 a.m. on a regular basis!
Why don’t they have night school for kindergartners?
Review – VTech KidiArt Studio
October 1, 2008
Last week, a very nice woman by the name of Kristin contacted me. She works at Edelman on the VTech account and was wondering if I was still interested in being part of VTech’s Demo Team.
When I was out at BlogHer this Summer, VTech had one of the most intriguing booths out there. They kept bringing out toys that I just knew I couldn’t go over and play with – because I’d end up buying every one for my darling daughter and also because I knew I’d feel guilty about it if I got to play with them and she didn’t. So I went over – made mental notes about what things were probably going to have to go on the Christmas list this year. Oh, and let them know that I’d love to be part of the VTech Demo Team given the chance.
What’s the VTech Demo Team? Basically, moms who will have a chance to test out VTech toys and share their experiences. It’s feedback for the VTech folks from real parents and their kids. In this case, it’s also information that I’m going to share with you, dear readers!
So when the box containing the VTech KidiArt Studio showed up on my doorstep last Friday? It was met with great anticipation! After all, this was definitely on the Christmas list… so a little Christmas in September wasn’t exactly unwelcome.
As you can see in the slide show, it was taken out of the box as quickly as possible. But due to my own state of illness on that day – it was left up to GeekDaddy and Buttercup to set it up and get it going. Which they did.
Then Buttercup proceeded to get obsessed by it for the next 4 days.
She played with it until the batteries died. She begged for new batteries. She played with it after the new batteries were in. She showed it to her best friend T when she came over for a play-date on Monday… and they played with it until the arguments about who should get the pen got beyond bearable and I sent them off to play something else.
So. You’re getting the idea already that this particular toy is getting a thumbs up, right?
It didn’t take Buttercup very long to figure out the interface. One of the things we do with new tech toys is just let her start playing with it. Yes, we keep the manual nearby – but if it’s too hard for her to figure out on her own? It’s losing points pretty quickly. Fortunately, it didn’t take her terribly long to figure it out. The icons are easy for a kindergartner to figure out – the pen & table interface is pretty easy to get used to as well.
She played with all of the various features. She seemed to understand it better than I did… Then again, I’m all for a toy that she gets well enough that I don’t have to help her to every little thing with.
Buttercup is the kind of kid who loves playing with Microsoft Paint on the computer for as long as she can – or any other program that has “graphic capabilities” – so I figured that she’d like having her own ‘electronic art studio’ and I was right. What I didn’t count on was that she’d want it to do more than it did. She was a little disappointed that “make your own movie” was really about doing stop-motion photography with clip-art. She’s gotten too used to livestreaming video I’m afraid. (Go figure.)
Okay, so to shorten this up a bit – let me put this in more of a bullet-point list for you.
Things We Liked
- Easy to set up
- Easy to use – even for an almost-6 year old who hasn’t read the directions
- Lots of clip-art and different things the software allows for
- Ability to expand (apparently – there are or will be other cartridges available for this – or so GeekDaddy tells me.)
- Child-friendly environment – the sounds, little character voices, pictures and clip art provide a great atmosphere for kids.
- Having the ability to plug it into either the TV (using S-video jacks) or the computer is a nice perk.
- It continues to be interesting the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th day. Altogether too often, electronic toys lose their allure after about day 2 here. It’s only the good ones that stick around longer than that. This one has.
Things We Didn’t Like
- The batteries rand out rather quickly, despite putting 8 fully charged ones into it on Friday, by Monday morning, they were drained. GeekDaddy tells me he thought there was some way to plug a power-supply into it, but one wasn’t provided… and the site seems to imply that batteries are required.
- The camera isn’t the highest quality – and seems to have a strange delay that means that the picture is actually taken about 1 full second after the sound of the ‘click’ and the frame freezes… because when you see the actual picture, it’s not the same. Which is not good if you have a child who likes to squirm about right after the click.
- The camera also seems to “flip” the picture when it’s pointed at the child. Images from the desk come out as shown – images taken of the seated child do a mirror-image flip.
- The pen-drag interface isn’t as smooth as a mouse… so it takes a bit to “get it”. Buttercup picked it up after a bit, but Mom & Dad still have issues.
- Lack of light source – the camera doesn’t have a flash, and it doesn’t do very well in low light. We had to open the windows and turn on extra lights to get decent pictures. A flash would be nice.
When it comes down to it, the plusses actually out-weigh the minuses. This is a fantastic educational toy as well as one that masquerades as pure entertainment from the kidlet’s point of view. It improves motor function and fine motor control, spatial relationships and shapes.
On a scale from 1 to 10, 1 being “wouldn’t use it even if it was free” and 10 being “impossible to drag the kids away from it, plus an amazing deal for the price” I’d give the VTech KidiArt Studio an 8.5 – but only because of the lack of a power supply and the weirdness with the camera. All in all, we *do* have to drag Buttercup away from it – which is how I know the battery thing is an issue.
So yeah, it’s worth putting on your Christmas list if you have an artistically inclined 4 to 7 year old in your house. I firmly expect that Buttercup will still be playing with hers through then!
Administrative note: This review was not paid for. The VTech KidiArt Studio was provided by the company for my review and feedback. The company had no influence or input on what is contained in the product review above. All opinions expressed are those of the author and those attributed to others specifically named in the review.
Way Cool Gadget for Beginning ‘Writers’
September 10, 2008
My darling Buttercup is taking to this whole reading & writing thing like a duck to water. She learned how to write her name and a few other basic words last year. Over the summer, she decided it was time to learn to read (thanks WordGirl!) and started teaching herself. So kindergarten has been a joy for her, as they have “Literacy” class every day and there is a lot of reading and writing for a thirsty young mind.
Wouldn’t it have been great then if we could’ve convinced her not to grip her pen/pencil/crayon like it was a drumstick? Her writing might’ve been a little less cavegirl-esque early on! Granted, she would’ve still occasionally written stuff “mirror-backwards” (she gets that from me, unfortunately) but it would’ve been mostly legible!
Over the weekend, GeekDaddy tried to start helping Buttercup with some “handwriting homework” – mostly writing her name in proper Title Case along with those lower-case letters. He tried to get her to hold her pencil correctly only to have a melt-down battle. I tried next and got her to hold it somewhat like one is supposed to, but couldn’t convince her that it would be easier if the eraser pointed toward her rather than away.
We got through the homework, but GeekDaddy and I decided we’d need to talk to her teacher – Mrs. J – and let her know that we needed to work on this both at home and at school.
Imagine my surprise then when Buttercup was writing a letter to a family member of ours this afternoon after school and holding the pencil correctly!
I was stunned.
The difference was night and day – really. Here I was thinking “wow! I must’ve really made an impression! I can’t believe how far she’s gotten in just 2 days!”
Then GeekDaddy came home and put one of these in my hand. It’s called a Stetro pencil grip. I’ve never heard of such a thing. I couldn’t even figure out what it did at first. Then he told me that Mrs. J had given him ‘a couple extra to take home.’
It seems this morning, just as Buttercup sat down to work in her notebook, GeekDaddy was in the midst of talking to Mrs. J about the handwriting thing and before he could get to it she said “Oh! I have something for Buttercup!” and got one of these out and put it on her pencil. There’s a little arrow that goes right between the finger and thumb and points downward to the paper. After that? the fingers just fall into place. Within moments, Buttercup was writing with a properly positioned pencil as if she’d been doing it that way all of her life.
And as soon as GeekDaddy put one of the ones on her pens at home? The same thing. So basically? It wasn’t 2 days and a wonder-Mom. It was a few hours and a gadget. Having tried it myself, I can say that I think it would work for just about anyone – even doctors with lousy handwriting!
Buttercup's Hand
Dang. I wish I had invented this.
As it is? GeekDaddy and I have discovered that you can buy them in bulk. So we’re going to be buying a couple of dozen to donate to the pre-school where Buttercup went last year. And a couple dozen more to give to any parents of pre-schoolers/kindergartners we know. Because seriously – even without it this afternoon – she was holding the pencil correctly. Makes me wish we’d had it when I was 5.
(This is a completely unsolicited and uncompensated review/endorsement of this product. All opinions expressed are those of the author of this blog.)
Not the Best Ambassador
January 25, 2008
Presidential politics and Private school… what have they got in common?
Well, if you’re me, then you’ve been having this frequent conversation about how the next President of the United States must be someone who can restore America to a position in the International community wherein we aren’t perceived as just as scary as “the Bad Guys” and who can somehow regain the trust and good will of our allies.
Foreign policy is a big deal these days – but it’s not as focused on as some of the other political hot topics. Health care, the War in Iraq, taxes, education, economy… those are the buzzwords on the political campaign trail.
But we also all know how much damage the U.S. has taken with regard to our reputation the past 7 years. Not unlike Britney Spears, when the U.S. messes up, it makes all the news sources – worldwide. Life on the front page means that there’s less room for error.
So even though it might not be a good topic for “campaign sound bites” – it certainly is going to be critical for the next President to address the Foreign Policy issues ASAP after his/her inauguration. That means if s/he doesn’t have the most extensive background in International Relations, getting the best ambassadors and advisers in that arena to help out.
Now let me backtrack to my original question – what does that have to do with private school?
Well, if you were bored enough to read my previous lengthy post on the process of applying to private/parochial preschools (seriously? you read all of that?) then you probably got the impression that it’s pretty much a one-sided decision. That would be my error, because the truth is that many folks forget that just like in a job interview, the candidate is also ‘interviewing’ the company and the applicant is ‘considering’ the school.
When trying to narrow down schools to apply to, one of the biggest considerations aside from academics, cost, and location is “would we, as a family, like being a part of this community?”
Now, private schools run the gamut when it comes to student population these days. Gone are the days of strictly white, financially well-off, homogeneous student bodies comprised of offspring wearing the same uniform and using the school campus as a way to avoid the ‘other classes and ethnicities’ by hiding in their enclaves. Most schools strive for diversity and depth. All ethnicities, cultures, and economic classes are represented. Of the schools we opted to apply to, approximately 15% of the students receive financial aid. Even so, it’s still school-to-school when it comes to feeling like you will ‘belong’ there as a family even if you don’t fit the ‘traditional mold’.
The moment of truth, as it were, for finding out where you fall on the spectrum of parental types for each school usually comes during either the school tour, an open house, or the ‘parent socializing’ during the time that your offspring is off interacting with the other potential classmates and the teachers.
The reasons parents opt to send their children to private schools are as myriad and varied as why they choose one vacation over another or why they choose one pediatrician over another. Some actually send their kids there for the status “My Suzie goes to Academy X!” they also tend to drive cars based on name and clothes based on label. Some are academically motivated, some religiously, and some just want to give their children opportunities they didn’t have.
Standing around drinking coffee out of paper cups and ignoring the outlay of pastries while making smalltalk is the best way to find out what the other parents are like. I mean, barring relocation or something, you are likely to spend at least the next 9 years, possibly 13 if it’s a K-12 school, interacting with these folks. If they’re all devout members of a church you don’t attend, or if they all were Debutantes and East Coast preppies, you probably want to know that in advance.
Today was Buttercup’s 5th birthday (yay!! But I’ll address that separately.) This morning was Kindergarten Roundup number two of three. Before today, this school was top on GeekDaddy’s list and doing well on mine. If customer service alone determined where we sent her to school, this one would be it. They have gone over the top with communication, enthusiasm and positivity. She even received a birthday card from them!
But today we got to the campus in freezing temperatures and shuttled Buttercup off to her hour plus of ’roundup’ time and then plunged into the mid-morning parents-trapped-in-a-room-waiting social opportunity.
Oddly, there was no one from the school in the room with the parents. Every place else we have done this, at the very minimum Admissions folk were mingling about keeping tabs on everything. Here, we were just sort of thrown in a room and retrieved an hour later when the kids were done.
Now, I’m used to working rooms socially. Despite a touch of agoraphobia that is ever present, I’ve learned through my past experience how to bring people out and mingle and include the fringes so that eventually everyone is chatting – and that’s exactly what I did. In the absence of a hostess, my little light-switch clicks into the “on” position and I get down to being the social hostess my Nana raised me to be back before I turned down the opportunity to be a Deb. Most of the parents seemed relieved that someone was willing to start the ball rolling, so GeekDaddy (also amazingly good at this, despite his innate geekitude) and I separated and started working the poorly set-up room. Note to the organizer: putting a couple of dozen people in a room with 4 conference tables forming an impenetrable square in the middle of the room is a bad idea. This forces groups to clump in the corners and get stuck unable to go around.
About half way through this process, I was talking to one of the nicest women, who had just moved to the area from Louisville KY. Before I could even get to the point where I mentioned that we had almost ended up relocating there a few years back for GeekDaddy’s company, we were joined by Her.
Her has a name, and while I’ll leave her last name off to respect her privacy, it was oddly inapt that her name was Stephanie. She was the least stereotypical Stephanie I’ve ever met.
What I know, after 30 minutes of being literally trapped by Stephanie is that if I have to spend 9 years in the same school community with that woman, I’m likely to end up criminally liable for something.
If I thought that maybe there was a chance she wouldn’t be there, or that she might not stay if she were, that hope was dashed when she told us repeatedly that she was there for her third son. The other two were in 8th and 4th grade respectively, and the 8th grader had been there since Kindergarten. She has every intention of being there until the 3rd one is off to high school. Ugh.
I could go into detail about why I detested her so – but what’s the point? You know people you detest, and you don’t necessarily have to outline why – you just think ‘ew.’ In this case, just go with the fact that the ‘ew’ factor was strong enough that I found myself starting to goad her. Another potential mom joined us and made a somewhat innocuous comment that she replied to with something snotty. I couldn’t help myself, I found myself saying the exact thing I knew would set her off and at the same time, make her look bad. She rose for the bait and then seemed to catch what I had done and shook her head like a dog trying to get water out of it’s ear. No, she didn’t shake it off. From that point forward, it was the same pattern. She’d snark, I’d pounce, she’d fall for it and look bad, then she’d get snarkier.
No – I don’t need 9 years of that. I’m a generally nice person, but some people do bring out the worst in me and Stephanie is one of them. Best to remove myself from the temptation altogether.
Meanwhile, GeekDaddy got trapped on the other side of the room – due to the strange table configuration – but at least had a nicer conversation. When reunited, he looked at me and said “uh oh… I can tell you’ve got something on your mind. You’re not mad at me, are you?” He’s so sweet! “Nope, not mad at you – but we’ll talk about it later.”
In the end, that school has dropped to the bottom of my list. Because of Stephanie. At one point, one of the other moms asked me about the other 2 schools we had applied to, and before I could get a word in edgewise, Stephanie piped up with “oh they’re not nearly as good as this one – you’re daughter is into the Liberal Arts, right?” Trying not to go too deeply into the fact that no one really knows if a 5 year old is “into Liberal Arts” I replied with “well, yes, she’s got that creative side to her…” and was met with “well, see, then you know this is the right school – those others I’ve heard aren’t as good as this for Liberal Arts…” The Devil made me do it, I swear, as I replied with “huh, you know, my niece has attended one of those schools for10 yeas now, and actually, its Liberal Arts programs are stronger than those here, but there you go…”
True? Maybe, to a point. Define “Liberal Arts” (and no, I can’t hear that in my head without quotes around it now, thanks.)
My point is that for all of its amazing customer service and friendly atmosphere, the school kind of messed up here. Since no one from admissions was in the room – the sole ‘ambassador’ for the school itself was the one person in the room who already had children going there. Was she a good ambassador? No. In fact, I could see she had a similar impact on at least one other mom there. Had this been an event I was actually responsible for, somewhere around the point where I started baiting her, I would’ve dropped over and escorted one of us away to another group saying “Oh, have you met so-and-so? She’s got X in common with you!”
The last of the 3 KR’s is coming up next week. It’s the school my niece attends. This makes the third year we’ve done this part. One of the things I look forward to is watching their head of admissions work the room just like I described above. I’ve seen her do it. I’ve seen her direct one set of parents to another and defuse potential conflicts. Much as I’m still mildly annoyed at them for other reasons, it will be a relief to see that aspect handled professionally.
There’s a part of me that, should we end up not going to school #2, wants to contact the Admissions folk and say “you know, for all you did right, it only took 10 minutes for us to have that image ruined by an obnoxious parent. Maybe you ought to consider doing what school #1 does, and having a question and answer session with the school head and the parents rather than letting them mingle unattended.”
Then again, I guess I benefit from knowing now what I will have in store for me should we go that route.
Now if only it were as simple to figure out which Presidential candidate is savvy enough to not leave our allies alone in a room to talk about us…
What You Didn’t Know About the Private School Kindergarten Process (and neither did we once)
January 15, 2008
There was a point in time where I laughed at sitcoms showing nervous parents trying desperately to get their children into private schools that were tougher in their admissions process than Ivy League colleges. Oh the humor in watching parents jump through ever higher hoops and ever more stressful situations in the hopes of getting little Johnny or Suzy into the ‘right’ preschool or kindergarten!
That was, of course, before GeekDaddy and I gave birth to Buttercup and agreed that we’d sooner cut off our own arms than send her to most public schools.
Given that we don’t live on either coast, I didn’t suspect that we’d be subjected to quite as rigorous a process as might be expected in areas where the wait-lists for preschools start at birth, and a year’s tuition is comparable to a semester at Harvard.
Still, the experience has been enlightening and it has its brighter moments. Or at least, its moments of humor.
This is actually our 3rd year in the process. The first two years involved only one school. In the hopes of avoiding the masses that start showing up at Kindergarten level, we applied to the private school my niece has attended for the past 9 years for preschool when Buttercup was just turning 3 years old. Gritting our teeth and telling ourselves that it was an acceptable price to pay 2 1/2 times the tuition we were already paying at her then preschool if it meant assured enrollment at one of the better schools, we began the dance.
The numbers at 3 and 4 year preschool in terms of applicants versus acceptance at that point was only 8-to-1. Apparently, in Kindergarten, the numbers go up anywhere from 10-to-1 to 25-to-1 or more, depending on the year and the school. I’ve been told from a reliable source that one of the local private schools (where she works) has a 40-to-1 applicant to availability ratio starting with first grade.
Despite everything I won’t bore you with here, we were wait-listed the past 2 years at that school. Buttercup was the first non-sibling, non-faculty-member’s-child, girl on that wait-list. If she had been a boy, apparently, she would’ve gotten in. But as it was, we breathed a sigh of relief at not having to pay the tuition for a couple more years, and still having the familiarity with that school. At least because she was wait-listed, we don’t have to pay the application fee again, just say “yep, put us in the pool for this year…” and get her teacher recommendation and go.
But this year has been a little different. And by ‘different’ I mean ‘more stressful.’ Most of the private schools around here pretty much start accepting kids at 5 years old. Whether K-8 or K-12, they leave the preschool to ‘feeder’ schools and the big influx starts at kindergarten. So we began the process as early as we could – starting the investigations of the potential schools last Spring.
After much research, we narrowed the field down to 5 schools to tour in the Fall, and after touring – 3 to apply to. I’ll spare you the details on how that was decided – but suffice to say, even when you are just ‘touring’ the schools pre-application, there is much scrutiny on the part of the school as to whether or not you are the type of family they would welcome an application from or not.
Of course the vetting process begins long before the formal application/interview/selection process does. From the first moment you are on the phone with an Admissions person, you are being assessed. No, not your child – you. Private schools aren’t all about the child, you see. They are also about the family. Unlike public schools, private schools rely on a sense of community to further their school’s success. Tuition doesn’t cover the actual costs of running these schools – there are fund-raisers, donations, and fees as well. It’s important to have a community of families that is willing to work together to make sure the school thrives. Much of the process is about the prospective student, but believe me when I tell you that the parents are just as scrutinized.
Late September and early October begins the touring process. In most cases, this means both parents coming in to meet with someone in Admissions and get shown the campus (sans child) and have the school’s philosophies, practices, and environment explained. This might be done with or without the child (mostly without) and it might be just you, or you might be grouped with another couple or two, depending on the number of applicants. In October and November come the Open Houses. Despite having already toured the campus, parents show up (again, whether or not child-friendly depends on the school) and re-tour it with large hordes of other parents. This is done when they can meet with faculty and administrative types and wander about ‘oohing’ and ‘ahhing’ when the children aren’t busy using the facilities themselves.
Once the touring and Open House hopping is done, parents must begin the application process. This means pages of applications filled out, teacher recommendation forms delivered to the current teacher(s) with stamped envelopes and instructions to return them in December (after they’ve had time to get to know the child), photos, parent statements, and if you have a child over 1st grade applying, testing.
Oh, and check-writing. Did I forget to mention the check-writing? Even here in the middle of the country each school has a ‘non-refundable application fee’ that is anywhere from $35-$150 but averaging about $75 per school. This makes sense when you realize that it keeps the number of ‘well let’s just apply to all of them and then decide later’ types down. But it still kind of hurts to write a check to a school that might never even consider letting your child go there, or knowing that it’s just money that you spent as a backup in case your first choice didn’t come through.
January. Ah, January! We’re in January now – and this is when the dance starts in earnest. At this point, we have gotten all of the applications, teacher recommendations, checks, photos, statements and whatnot completed. And so begin the “Kindergarten Roundups.”
If the term “roundup” conjures to mind a cattle-drive, I suspect that is not entirely unintended. These are group dates – wherein all those little would-be Kindergarteners come and visit the classrooms and the prospective teachers (and other evaluators) en masse. This is to see how your little Suzy or Johnny interacts in the classroom environment. It’s all well and good that you said on your application that your child was not only as brilliant as Einstein, s/he was also as angelic as Mother Teresa, and as sweet as honey… and that your child’s present teacher wrote glowing lines bordering on poetry about how s/he was a delight to teach and the light of each day… They want to actually see whether or not Johnny or Suzy is prone to eating glue, kicking other children in the shins, or emulating their favorite WWF character.
My heart goes out to some of these kids when we do this. It’s clear that there’s always a handful who are terrified when they face this ordeal. Clearly, they’d rather be anywhere other than a classroom full of prettily dressed but terrifyingly unknown other children vying for coveted spots in this school. To say that we’re lucky is an understatement. Buttercup seems to have a knack for this sort of thing and is her own best ambassador. We’ve watched her walk over to a crying child trying desperately to cling to her parents’ legs in hope of not being left and say directly in front of the teachers “it’s okay, this will be fun, why don’t you come play with me? Look, here’s a horse!” Wilting violet she is not.
However, whilst the children are being corralled at said roundup, the parents are lead elsewhere on the campus. There’s always coffee and food involved. Sometimes there’s a presentation. Sometimes there’s just socializing with the other parents. Sometimes it’s a Q&A session with the head of admissions or the Headmaster of the school. Again, depends on the school. But let not the unwary drop his or her guard! This is yet another time for someone at the school to assess the parents. Who showed up? Just Mom? Both parents? Are they talking to anyone? Are they staying at the fringes?
In some cases (but not all) there is yet another step – the ‘parent interview.’ We’ve been through 2 of these now – one 3 years ago at school number one – and one today, at school number two of the three. This is definitely a non-child event, and requires both parents to be there if there is more than one parent.
The ostensible purpose of this is that you, the parents will ’shed further light’ on the nature of your darling offspring. Having read your application, parents’ statement, and seen your child in action – you will be asked questions to help them to get a better picture of your potential scholar. Essentially? It’s a job interview. But you’re being asked more about your child than yourself.
Don’t get me wrong here – these people know what they are doing – they do it every year. They learn quite a bit about you without asking about you directly. Questions like “how do you spend your time together when you are with your child? Would you say it’s structured or unstructured?” tell more about your parenting style than the child’s readiness for kindergarten.
The thing is – whenever we’re there, going through these arcane processes and hoop-jumping, I can’t help but be reminded of those sitcoms I mentioned above. It makes me laugh… and you know, laughter is a good thing. It reminds you that while none of us like to feel that we are being judged and perhaps found wanting, at least there’s some good to be gleaned from the experience.
Apparently, most parents forget to laugh in their driven determination to assist their offspring in overcoming the competition and gaining the coveted invitation to enroll. I know this because every time we end up laughing or kidding around, there’s sort of this awestruck look on the face of those on the other side of the equation. I suspect they are far too used to dealing with tense, stressed-out parents on a regular basis – and not unlike traffic cops who are always met with anything other than friendliness when they pull someone over – they get accustomed to steeling themselves against the waves of emotional turmoil emanating from prospective parents. When met with genuine laughter and humor, there’s usually an initial look of confusion replaced by relief.
Take, to whit, what happened on our way out of School #2 today. We were leaving just as school was letting out for the day – and so, ensconced in a heaving mass of scurrying schoolchildren, we found ourselves coming out the front door of the main building just as the Headmaster was coming in.
He greeted us warmly (points to him for remembering!) and said “oh! Are you here for the interview? How did it go? “
I looked at him and said, wryly “Oh, fairly well – probably would’ve gone better if we hadn’t spilled coffee all over her and called her names there at the end…”
Which warranted me a confused smile and a momentary pause, until GeekDaddy chimed in deadpan with “Yep, fortunately, we were able to keep the Tourret Syndrome under control this time!”
The Headmaster looked back and forth at us, caught the gleam in our eyes and the grins starting to form that we couldn’t help and burst out laughing himself. “A sense of humor!” he said, “That’s a very good thing to have around here… Very good!”
And we smiled and replied “and we’re glad to find out that you have one as well, sir!” and took our leave.
Next week, school #3 – the Catholic one. Should be fun.
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